"To
produce a mighty book," Melville says in Moby-Dick, "you must choose a mighty theme. No great
and enduring volume can ever be written on the flea." Howard Jacobson sets
out to prove Melville wrong with The
Mighty Walzer, a novel that features ping-pong, a "flea" in the
kingdom of sport, at least in English-speaking locales. Originally published in
Britain in 1999, The Mighty Walzer is now being released in the United States to take
advantage of the author's new, exportable stature as winner of the Man Booker
Prize last year for The Finkler Question.
A promising junior player
in England in the 1950s, Jacobson could quote George Plimpton to Melville: "The
smaller the ball used in the sport," Plimpton wrote, "the better the
book." When I was playing and writing about basketball, a baseball-playing
friend would torture me with his adaptation of Plimpton: "the smaller the
ball, the greater the skill." Now I play ping-pong, understand the
challenge of chasing flea balls, and admire Jacobson's courage.
Readers with little
affection for literary sports novels such as, for example, Robert Coover's Universal Baseball Association or Don DeLillo's End Zone, should know that The Mighty Walzer is primarily a coming-of-age story. It contains
enough ping-pong to demonstrate Jacobson's authority (paddles, strokes,
strategies, lore) and to function as a metaphor for Oliver Walzer, a closed-in
boy from a Jewish family in a dreary Manchester neighborhood, but sport does
not dominate the book as it does Coover's and DeLillo's novels. The Mighty Walzer is closer to that
big-ball (and itchy balls) basketball book Rabbit
Run.
Until Oliver discovers
ping-pong, he spends hours in the bathroom cutting up family photos of women,
pasting the heads on bodies in soft porn magazines, and using them for
masturbatory stimuli. His father forces Oliver out to join a ping-pong club,
where he feels relatively comfortable with almost equally introverted
teammates. As a teenager, Oliver wins tournaments, manages to have a girl
fellate him, almost has sex with the ping-pong playing Lorna Peachley (whom he
believes he loves), eventually parlays his skill into acceptance by Cambridge's
"Golem College," and competes at the ping-pong table for the
university. But Oliver suffers from self-diagnosed "grandiosity." When
his heroic expectations are confuted and, in his mind, mocked—no one watches
his victories, girls don't flock to a champion, and his college mates don't
understand his talents—Oliver falls half in love with defeat, with failure. He
lets opponents win, gives up on Lorna, commits to dead-end studies.
Later in life, Oliver
believes that ping-pong—a crucial source of his identity and his way out into
the world—was itself enclosed: "It was too small. A parlour game. It
suffered from too modest a conception of itself. Ping-pong—what kind of name was that? Table tennis was hardly any
better….Whiff Waff was another one they tried. Meaning what? Something
insubstantial, piffling, neither here nor there, like swatting at flies."
Oliver's late recognition
of his game's limitations is common in sports fiction, but Jacobson artfully
complicates his narrator's conventional wisdom. Oliver tells his story forty
years after most of its events, and his insistence on a direct line of
psychological cause and effect—grandiose desire leading to "voluptuous
defeatism"—isn't wholly believable. A tour guide in Venice in the novel's
present, the 60ish Oliver returns to Manchester and finds that his old
teammates remember events differently—more positively—than he does.
In a revealing
autobiographical essay about ping-pong, which takes some sentences from his
novel, Jacobson says that he remembers his losses but none of his victories. He
also says that, whether or not a player is still active, the game pervades
consciousness, "becomes the very model of experience itself." Oliver
Walzer has these same psychological peculiarities, and Jacobson uses them to
play a game of narrational unreliability with his reader/opponent, a game like
that played by his character Phil Radic, whom Oliver calls a "master"
of "finding angles you'd never have guessed were there." Oliver's
questionable reliability adds a second, welcome meaning to "coming of age":
Jacobson implies that coming into old age may distort memory of the first
coming of age, may project back onto youth a sense of late-life failings.
As a narrator, Oliver is a
bit overbearing, more than a little digressive, and, yes, occasionally
grandiose in his style, as the title suggests by echoing the name of the former
Olympic champion Jan-Ove Waldner. Fortunately, Oliver is also a sharp-eyed
observer of others. Beckett has a character say, "Nothing is funnier than
unhappiness," and Jacobson knows how to put his unhappy narrator into
comic situations. First is the Walzer family—a dumb but ambitious father, a
long-worrying mother, and her three sisters who seem to Oliver to wear an "S"
for spinster on their chests. Aunt Fay conducts an extended telephone courtship
with an obscene caller. Aunt Dora betrays aunt Dolly by running off with the
man who had been courting Dolly.
Oliver's young Jewish
teammates all have physical quirks and are humorously two dimensional,
combining a passion for ping-pong with some other obsession, such as an
exaggerated sensitivity to anti-Semitism, the rigorous classification of
operatic tenors, or the development of skirt-chasing expertise. The best of
them, Sheeny Waxman, has an identifying tic, which he somehow turns to erotic
advantage. The girl with whom Oliver is successful (and later unsuccessfully
marries) sleeps with anyone who disrespects her to show her disrespect for such
a person, a logic much admired by the boys in the novel except, of course,
Oliver.
After Oliver, the novel's dominant
character is his father, Joel, a womanizer who sells junk or "swag"
(a Britishism) or "tsatskes" (a Yiddishism) at outdoor markets.
"Tsatske," which can mean an attractive unconventional woman or an
inexpensive showy trinket, is a key concept in the book, for Oliver uses the
word to describe ping-pong and other activities or people that he feels have
little intrinsic value. Joel Walzer is the king of "tsatskes," as
well as the duke of failure. Here is Oliver describing some of his father's
miscellaneous and almost fail-sure goods:
Swag
took in chalk love-in-a-cottage wall plaques and shepherd and shepherdess
figurines and hot-water bottles that burst when you filled them with hot water
and torches that didn't work in the dark and plastic colanders with no holes in
them and hula hoops and shockproof deep-sea divers' watches and jardinières and
folding chairs that could kill when they sprang shut and dolls that sometimes
said "Mama" but more often than not didn't and leatherette
writing-pad compendiums and dictionaries that had no definitions in them and
plastic potties to go under the bed….
Oliver spends much of his
life fleeing his father's ignorance and world of swag, and yet Oliver's (and
Jacobson's) book is itself like a jammed and disorderly display of "tsatskes"—one
beautiful woman and many comic trinkets about Eastern-European Jewish
immigrants, sex-starved adolescents, players of a stupidly named sport, and
Cambridge dolts (both faculty and students). The Finkler Question was the first comic novel to win the Man
Booker Prize. I think The Mighty Walzer
is more amusing—not as economically constructed as The Finkler Question, but also without that novel's ideological
abstractions and thudding satire.
Jacobson has been called
Britain's Philip Roth, and one can see why with the Portnoyian masturbation
scenes in The Mighty Walzer. But
Jacobson has said he'd prefer to be known as the "Jewish Jane Austen."
Although his pop- and sub-culture subjects are far from Austen's, Jacobson has
some of her humane humor and forgiving wit. Will these qualities make The Mighty Walzer, contra Melville, an "enduring
volume"? It has lasted twelve years, and I don't believe it's grandiose to
say that, for now, it is the Great English Language Ping-Pong Novel.
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