I am a fiction writer, poet, lyricist, documentarian, and did I mention poet? I have written over 1,700 pieces of flash fiction, a genre that, as the novel and the symphony once did, is just waiting for its time to shine.
I am a frequent contributor to flash fiction websites Gruff Town, Mug Rump, Gruff Town Quarterly, Story-zilla, The Word Slinger, Little Platz, Lil’ Words, Gruff Town Monthly, Word Shack, Did Someone Say “Flash Fiction?”, Bobo’s Story Brigade, Gruff Town Weekly, Night Fantastix, Gruff Town Daily, Knight-Night, and Gruff Town Hourly. I also write the regular “Author’s Lament” column at Gruff Town for Kids.
Here’s a brief snippet of my latest piece: “Claudia looked at the tattered umbrella with a sense of …” (You can find out what happens next with a paid subscription to Gruff Town Weekly.)
Oh, but I create more than just flash fiction! My twenty-three-part serial “Mr. Henderson’s Tea Cup” was published online at both Dragon Goblet and Mysterio Malady under my pen name Thaddeus Q. The Floridian Dream Pillow (a small, but up-and-coming e-zine) gave it nine Library Ladders out of ten. Comet Birdfeather, author of such fan-fiction pieces as "Horry Patter and the Boots of Poison” and “Cheers: Sam Malone Hooks Up With Carla,” said this work was, “The best piece of online literature since ‘Sandworms Ahoy’ and I expect great things from Mr. Q.”
My collaborator, Ethan (last name redacted) and I are currently working on an online novel, for the Online Novel Depot. I’m hesitant to talk openly about the work, but let’s just say it’s a sequel (of sorts) to our previous internet novel (or webovel, as everyone calls them) “Oh Come All Ye Witches to the Stairs of Hellpit,” except this will be much darker, but also satirical and sincere. Ethan describes it as “A Clockwork Orange meets Calvin and Hobbes.” And much as I wish I could, I can’t think of a better analogy.
We will also be releasing an audio version, as read by me and recorded via my voicemail, available for download at my Aunt’s website (JackiesFlowers1967.org) which is usually about flowers, but she’s letting me post this as part of my forty-first-birthday present. (Thanks, Aunt Jackie!)
Not to brag, but “Ophelia’s Lust,” my novella about a 17th-century sea voyage and 23rd-century nano-robots, was published in the "Foyer" section of Chomper’s Lounge, a website devoted to speculative shark fiction, and has received 45 comments thus far, although most of them are invective from Ethan.
At the age of only 41, I have outwritten, in terms of sheer bulk if nothing else, the greatest masters of literature, and I consider myself a true wordman. If you are considering contacting me about publishing my future work, let me whet your appetite by divulging that I’m half-finished with a story about a dog that is also a cat.
Dan Bergstein really does contribute to Mug Rump. No, really-- he does.
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